We are all truly unique, as much in our perspectives about
life as in our attitudes, feelings and experiences. There has never been an
exact duplicate of you and there never will be. You’re irreplaceable; there’s
no one else like you in the entire world.
It’s precisely our differences and personal characteristics
that make life interesting and challenging. Interacting with people who see
life differently is what makes relationships even richer. What’s regrettable is
that, when incorrectly dealt with, these differences can frequently lead to
unresolved conflict, stress and disappointment.
When we fail to establish this difference, we end up feeling
disappointed and frustrated with others. We shouldn’t insist that other people
act, think or work the way we do, because that attitude is going to cause
problems every time. Your approach is very important when it comes to asking
someone to change, because we can throw it all away and achieve exactly the
opposite of what we were hoping for.
Nobody changes just like that, simply because they are now
aware your desires; that’s not how it works. And if that’s what you expect to
happen, then you’re just going to get more irritated every day, until one day
you simply “explode.”
It’s much more productive and effective to talk with the
other person about what’s bothering you, explain how it affects you and how it
makes you feel. This way the other person doesn’t feel insulted or attacked,
and it’s more likely that they’ll change their attitude. In a similar way, we
must be open to feedback from other people when we are suggested they change
something, with the end goal of getting along better and more comfortably.
You should never have to change someone to suit your needs,
your ways, and your preferences. You should love someone for who they are
naturally, and without them having to conform and change into some version of
what you feel is acceptable in order for them to be accepted by you. You
shouldn’t have to change, and you shouldn’t want others to have to change in
ways that will take away from who they are at their core,
and in their beliefs. This goes for how they look in their appearance
as well.
It’s important to realize that you shouldn’t change
people, and you should definitely be weary of people that try to change you.
Not only shouldn’t you try to change people from their natural ways of doing
things, how they think, how they feel, how they look, and how they act, but you
need to understand that people’s core values and natural ways won’t
change. Even if someone temporarily changes themselves in order to please
you, it’s true that they’re being kind, giving, and trying to accommodate your
needs or desires. But if you think about it, you’re changing someone, and from
their perspective, they’re changing for you, and it’s totally uncool.
We can’t change other people, and we really shouldn’t try
to. We should accept people for how they are, because that’s what makes each
and every one of us so beautiful and special. You need to embrace who you
are deep down at your core, and to the point where others will be able to
truly see who the real you is and extend the same grace to others.
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